12/10/15

losing Facebook friends

Now, don't let the title fool you.
This isn't a post on how to eliminate 50% of your Facebook friends you're not really friends with.
This is me sharing that I'm worried Facebook is going to make me not want to be friends with some of my real friends.

Somewhere between knowing a person enough to want to see picture of their vacations and funny anecdotes about raising kids, I am flooded with tons of things that make me wonder:  why are we even friends?

We live in a world that makes it very easy to share our opinion with the masses.
Hell, of course you know about this.
I write a BLOG.  You're reading it.  It's all about my opinion!
However, you have to seek me out.  (Thank you for that, by the way.)

Facebook, Twitter, all of it...
It's a visual stream of everyone's thoughts.
You don't seek out someone with any major intent.  You're friends.  They show up on your feed.
You read what they think.
Forget status updates; all of the click-bait articles you need to read right now.

Did you see what the government is doing to Jewish pandas?
Or {insert anything about guns and gay people}
Trump.  Don't even get me started.
Politics.  Barf

Did you know that your breasts will fall off if you don't breastfeed?
Your child has a 18% chance of becoming a murderer if they ride in a stroller once they can walk? 
Parenting know-it-alls.  Barf.

Click here to see how you're eating organic foods wrong!
Keep this food in your fridge and you'll be able to levitate.
Food posts (unless it's a 10-second video recipe involving cheese or vodka).  Barf.

Do you love your mom.  Share if yes, Ignore if no.
Shut up you.  I love my mom.  I don't need to share you stupid picture to boost your analytics to prove it.
Click bait.  All of it.

I do however love a good joke.  And Matt Bellassai.
I'll share that shit all day long.

But the BARF things show up on my feed because my friends have liked or shared them.
My people are in to these things.
How can that be?
Now I'm faced with the dilemma:  scroll on and hope that a darling vacation or witty restaurant check-in will eventually show up
or...
Unfollow.

The Unfollow makes me sad.
Some of my Facebook friends are done on a whim:  you and I know 4 of the same people, we're probably compatible.
Thank god I'm not into online dating right now; I'd be hopeless.
I have Unfollowed some.
I can't deal with the BARF things.
You're still a good person.  We can hang out and have a drink and shoot the shit.
Because when we do, you don't mention all the BARF.
This is why we're friends in real life.
But on Facebook, we just don't see eye to eye.

As I look at the Unfollow friends I consider, it begs the question:
Should we be friends?
If you think one thing and I really don't, do we really mesh together?
The Unfollow is a safe step.
It's a hope for calmer waters.
But the articles will still be written.
Opinions will remain the same.

For now, the unfollow is safe.
If we're really friends, chances are I'll get to see you in real life and we can both leave all the BARF behind and just be friends.




1 comment:

tarita virtue said...

your intelligent and funny way of describing *facebook friendships* is not only DEAD ON ACCURATE, but a true breath of fresh air!!! Brava! i thoroughly appreciated reading your post!!!!!!

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